One: Open your eyes to self neglect.

February 7, 2019


So here is the first of seven articles designed to help you love yourself MORE!

Throughout this week you might want to make a journal if you don’t already have one or simply print out this article and fill in the blanks. The forum is a great place for you to post inspirational quotes, poems or suggestions about self love. It will prove to be a great creative outlet for you.

Often it is easier to look back at childhood memories or past relationships and pinpoint a specific moment where someone else made you feel unloved or uncared for. What you probably missed out on was the invitation to look at why what they did (or often didn't do) really affected you. If you find that the same types of situations really get to you, then that is something you may want to confide in with a good friend, trusted family member of therapist.

Exercise 1: below write down just one example of when you felt unloved. Be as detailed as possible.

Now fill in the blanks below:
It was not my fault that.................................................

.............................happened but I acknowledge that it made me feel.................................... Now I choose to let go of the feeling(s) of ..........................................................because I know I am loved and I have everything I need to succeed.

By doing this exercise you are tending to your past hurts that some how get in the way, by acknowledging them without dwelling. Repeating these moments of sadness out loud to others or even just having them on loop whenever you feel emotional, only serves to solidify them. Giving added significance to painful memories can be really damaging to your self esteem and alter the way in which you receive feedback from others.

Imagine you are caring for a small child as a favour to a friend and he or she damages something. Would you remind them of the broken vase/picture frame every single time you saw them? Probably not, at some point you would let it go. In the same way you need to let go of painful past experiences by not torturing yourself, wondering how it could have been different.

You can apply this to many different scenarios however it is important not to focus on too many negative experiences all at once.

Exercise 2: You have one minute to write down the things you enjoy. From taking an exercise class to travelling to a new city, the aim is to write as many as possible.

Now write down next to them how many times you do them in a month.

Now think about what you are living for if you do not do the things you enjoy daily? It is essential that you invest in yourself, physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually. Self-neglect is a serious condition so it is important to recognise the signs of poor self care, before it gets anywhere near such a diagnosis.

Well done for taking the time for yourself today. Write down any thoughts or feelings you had, whilst completing today's exercises. Be sure to check in tomorrow for the next instalment.

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